Thursday, May 20, 2010


Its the new catch all phrase for doctors, "Have you been under any stress lately?"
I have been having health problems on and off for a few years now. If I have severe heartburn atacks, I am asked the question, if I have feminine problems I am asked the question. Others I know have also been asked when they also have physical problems. Before become a analyst for Social Security I knew a lot about my body, but I have learned so much more...and YES , stress can be manifest in physical problems.I am no longer angry every time adoctor asks that. They are probably seeing a lot more stress in the country lately. Yes sir, I have been under stress. But why...does my body react this way? Well, I guess its going into survival mode. Stress causes your body to do that-HORMONES ETC.. What to do how do I take my stress and turn it into peace? Heck, I thought I was peaceful. But my neck and shoulders are all kinked up. I am having physical probems ..again. Oh well... my DH says this weekend we will RELAX! I need to read more scriptures.
My daughter likes Mulan. She sings a song that makes me tear up every time I hear it.Its by Christina Aguilera She sings...Look at me,You may think you seeWho I really am,But you'll never know me.Everyday, it's as if I playA part.Now I see,If I wear a mask,I can fool the world,but I cannot fool my heart.Chorus:Who is that girl I see?Staring straight,Back at me.When will my reflection showWho I am inside?I am now,In a worldWhere I have to hide in my heart,and what I believe in.But somehow,I will show the world what's inside my heart,And be loved for who I am.Who is that girl I see,staring straightback at me?Why is my reflection someone I don't know?Must I pretend that I'msomeone elsefor all time.When will my reflection show,who I am inside?There's a heart that must be freeto flyThat burns with a need to knowthe reason whyWhy must we all concealWhat we thinkHow we feel?Must there be a secret meI'm forced to hideI won't pretend that I'msomeone elsefor all time.When will my reflection showwho I am inside?When will my reflection showwho I am inside.
Its really a beautiful song. Sometimes I wonder why this world has become such that if you are conservative you must almost hide yourself from the liberal forces that feel it is ok to just be...with no standards, rules or commandments. I miss the days when I was a young mormon convert in Utah, we all were so innocent, everything made sense and we all worked towards the same goal. Young men gave me the shirts off their backs-literally. Our biggest worry was if so and so liked us and who was gonna show up to FHE . Now I am facing grown up worries and stresses. I think I am doing ok. I feel good about my direction. I feel proud of who I am and what I am teaching my little daughter. I am excited that I get to watch her grow up in a Church I love. And, my sweet DH always says, I worry too much. So for now I am going to try to reduce stress by bringing back my center-my peace read more scriptures,pray more, write more, spend time in my garden every day, play with my daughter more, exercise more and love the blessed health I have been given and a body that warns me- perhaps I need to be more centered!


About Me

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I am passionate about oh so many things:give me something pretty to make be it a card,scrapbooking,craft,journal or food...I seek after these things...I want to nurture with the things I create...this blog is about my pretty little rubies...